Is your teen being drawn into a cult? What do you do? Is your seven year old son’s hysterical violent outburst too aggressive for you to deal with? You asked and now Dr. Leman answers on today’s episode!
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Question #1:
My 16 year old daughter (by HER choice) became an active member of North Coast Christian Church and their 11/12 Ministry, attended camps, and had a close relationship with friends and the teen community of the church. She got baptized while at camp last fall and she was generally doing great and moving into a good direction. She then met a boy at the beach who is a good kid. She abruptly stopped all of her church activities and we asked why but she didn’t have an answer.
We just found out her boyfriends sister and Mom have been recruiting her to attend this cult with them behind our backs by arranging to pick her up “covertly” under pretense of her going “surfing”. My ex husband is very upset at this and confronted the Mom. What is your opinion on how to handle this situation so that we don’t push her away, yet keep her from joining this cult while she is still under our roof at age 16. Thank You
Dr. Leman’s Answer:
By confronting the boyfriend’s parent, you have already muddied the water, so to speak.
It sounds like you have poured a lot of love, encouragement and a great foundation into your daughter.
To enhance the probability of her returning to this foundation and making the right decision in this matter, I would encourage you to employ hospitality constantly.
Invite the boyfriend over for a dinner.
Let her see the difference in his family and your own.
Kill her with kindness and take the edge off of her rebellion.
Let her know that you believe in her and her ability to make a good decision.
Pray for her.
Question #2 Vladimir:
I have son who is 7 years. He has become very aggressive. He explodes a couple times a day for minimal reasons. In his hysterical attack he has bit my wife and I and spoke to us with very bad words. He is very dramatic and for about 10 to 15 minutes before stopping. We used your advice but we don’t know what to do to stop his behavior. Thanks.
Dr. Leman’s Answer:
It sounds like you have been too good of parents! Your son has become ego-centric and does not know how to deal with failure.
I would recommend getting my book, Parenting Your Powerful Child.
You can change what you do as a parent, and hopefully find growth in your son.
When he throws a fit:
1. Step over him
2. Isolate yourself from him
3. Give him much Vitamin N (No)
4. Become solemn, don’t talk to him
Remember, when you start changing as a parent with a powerful child, the kid will get worse before things start to improve.