Can you give your 6 year old the bread and water treatment? Does politely reminding your kids to stop whining work? Dr. Leman answers these questions with his usual wit and wisdom.
LISTEN HERE
Podcast: Play in new window | Download
Subscribe: RSS
Question #1 Patrick
We have a violent 1st grader who throws hard cover books and other hard things at us. Do we give a 6 year old the bread and water treatment, and what does that look like for a 6 year old?
Dr. Leman’s Answer:
Well, yes, you can do the bread and water treatment for a 6 year old. The stakes are high for your kid. Imagine now that he is 16 and loses a tennis tournament; will he throw his racket down and break it? Do you want to see adult temper tantrums?
Here is what the “bread and water treatment” would look like for your son:
1. All of a sudden stop doing for him. (no warnings) That means don’t tie shoes, don’t pour milk, no laundry, no rides to friend’s houses.
2. You provide just the basics. Food with no commentary.
3. He will feel the withdrawal of his parental involvement in his day to day activity.
4. Should not take long because he will hate it.
Question #2 Robin
My 2 1/2 year old daughter whines and throws fits when we are out in public and I stop to visit with a friend. She gets plenty of my attention. How do I stop this behavior?
Dr. Leman’s Answer:
The best thing is to remove her from the scene, which is not always possible in a store situation. If your husband is with you, have him take her out to the car or something. If you are visiting in a parking lot, put her in her carseat, roll down the window and stand near the car to talk. She will learn from your action, not words.
Dr. Kevin Leman’s Book that was mentioned in the podcast: Making Children Mind without Losing Yours